Broken Hearted
by Kinky-bootz88
Summary: Blair and Chuck trying to cope with her illness. One-shot


A/N: This is a Blair/Chuck one shot. I was in the mood to write tonight and this is what came out. Read and review please

He stood outside her hospital room, looking in at her. Her skin was nearly translucent, her eyelids were a dark shade of purple, her lips were hovering somewhere between blue and grey. He never thought he would see her like this. He never thought he would see her so vulnerable. He wanted so much to go in and wrap her in his arms. He wanted to kiss her lips until they turned back to the lip shade of red he remember them.

Her arms were so skinny he thought if he even ran his finger over them he might break it in half. She looked like she needed another blanket, he looked around for a nurse but quickly returned his eyes to Blair. He was scared to not look at her. He was scared that if he took his eyes off her for even a second she might not be there when his gaze returned.

His eyes quickly flicked to the heart monitor Blair was hooked up too. The doctors told him her heart was physically weak but it was strong in other ways. Blair was fighting this, she was fighting to survive. Her heart was getting weaker by the day, she needed a heart transplant but her body wasn't strong enough and there was an eighty per cent chance that it would reject the new heart. So for now she had to stay in the hospital, hooked up the all the machines that were physically keeping her heart going. If she was strong enough he would have give her his heart. One bullet in the head right outside the hospital. That is all it would have taken. And yes that would mean he would die and never see Blair get better. But living and seeing her get worse was not much better.

Blair had been back and forth to the hospital sixteen times in the past year. Each time she went in she stayed a little longer. This time they both know she would stay in until she got a transplant. Chuck had stayed in the hospital sixteen times in the past year. Since Blair had been diagnosed he never spent a night away from her. She often told him to go home, and if often told her he was home. His home was wherever she was. Blair would never know that he had sold his company and was using the money to fund research into her condition. She would never know how hard he was fighting for her.

Blair opened her eyes and looked around. She squinted as the florescent lights hurt her eyes. She saw Chuck standing at the window and smiled. Chucked smiled back and walked into the room. He shut the door gently behind him and slowly walked over to Blair's bed. He kissed her on the forehead. "Hi beautiful, did you have good dreams?"

"Yeah, you were in them." Blair answered quietly.

Chuck took the blanket from the chair which he slept on every night and laid it over Blair. She rolled her eyes, as she did when she thought Chuck was acting like she was breakable. They both knew she was in here to die but neither one of them wanted to say anything about it. Her death was the giant elephant they knew was probably coming to visit her soon. He moved a lock of her hair and put it behind her ear. "My best dreams are always the ones with you in them."

Blair smiled "Mine too"

Chuck pulled the chair closer to Blair's bed, he sat down on it and took her hand in his. Her hand was ice cold as it was every single time he touched it. She often joked that Edward Cullen and her had something in common. They also had a lot of differences, like him being virtually indestructible, and her being completely breakable. "Do you often dream about yourself?" Chuck asked raising an eyebrow

"You know what I meant." Blair answered rolling her eyes "My best dreams, and my only dreams are those with you in them. Stop being a smart-ass."

Chuck rubbed one of Blair's hands in between his trying to warm them up. Every time he did this Blair told him not to bother. It wasn't going to work, and that she was quite used to the cold hands now. Chuck lifted Blair hand and brought it to his lips kissing it gently. "I can't help it if I got the brains and the beauty."

"You didn't. I'm only with you for your huge trust fund" Blair smiled "I'm with my other boyfriends for looks and brains. One looks like Edward Cullen, and the other one could take Einstein in a science quiz any day."

"Wow they sound completely boring. One has no brains, and the other is a geek."

Blair laughed "You look a bit green Chuck. Are you a little jealous?"

"No." Chuck smiled "I am a whole lot jealous of any guy who gets your attention. I can't help it. I am a selfish creature who wants you all to himself."

"Well considering I live in this hospital, you only have doctors to worry about, and unless Edward Cullen is coming to treat me I will keep you around."

"Oh I am privileged."

"Can I have a drink please?"

Chuck nodded. He kissed Blair's hand, before letting go of it. He stood up and walked around to her bedside table. It killed him to see her so weak. He stared at the jug of water for a couple of seconds before lifting it and pouring some into the glass. He set it down again, put a straw into the glass and lifted it. He gently sat down on the bed beside Blair and put his arm around her to lift her up. She took a few small sips before taking the straw out of her mouth. Chuck set the glass on the bedside table before lying down beside Blair. He gentle wrapped his arms around her. It always hurt him to see how tiny she had become, how fragile. The complete opposite of everything she ever was.

"Chuck, can I ask you something?"

Chuck kissed her head "You can ask me anything."

"Do you believe in fate?"

Chuck was stomped by the question. He had believed in it up until Blair got sick. He could see no rhyme or reason for her to get sick, so now he had no idea if he did believe. "I don't know. I think some things are meant to happen, but some things are not. It is just life being cruel. Do you believe in fate?"

"Yeah I do. I think everything happens for a reason. And I believe no matter what happens you and me are meant to be and will be somehow. One of the times we went to lay flowers on your Father's grave I got a bit noisy and started to read all the head stones. There was this one couple who had been married for sixty-two years. And they died two days apart. She died first, and then he died two days after from a broken heart."

"And the reason behind that was?"

"They were never meant to be apart. They were two halves of one life. He died because he was meant to go and join her in heaven."

Chuck closed his eyes. He knew what Blair was getting at. He really wanted to stop this conversation. He really wanted to talk about something different. Thinking about the reality of the situation and the fact that he could lose her was too much for Chuck to bear. Chuck yawned "I think that you think too much."

"I think that you should go home and get some sleep."

"My home is wherever you are, so I am home and I will sleep when you sleep. Plus I think that if I fall asleep here you will draw all over my face like the last time."

Blair laughed "That was a fun day. You have given me some ideas of how to get into mischief next time you fall asleep."

"Why is it that I always regret conversations with you?"

"Because you have no fun in your life."

Chuck laughed. She was partly right. He spent every waking hour worrying about Blair, search his brain for ways to make her happy, searching the internet for the best heart surgeons, the newest treatments, the latest medication. But he got to spent all his time was her and that was enough to make him happy. Chuck watched the smile fall from Blair's face. "What is it? Do you need the doctor?"

"No no it's not that. It's just you really don't have any fun in your life. You spend all your time in the hospital with me, and we both know I am a barrel of laughs. You need to go have some fun."

Chuck kissed Blair's head, "Hey, I have plenty of fun in my life. Every day with you is fun. I don't want to be anywhere else but here. We can have plenty of fun together when you get better."

"I might not get better"

"I might not either"


End file.
